There is also a positive trickle over effect from having a relationship contract in the level of honesty that you then feel able to bring to every moment of your relationship… the idea being, if you were that explicit and clear about your desires once, you can continue to do so on an ongoing basis.īy mutually deciding to take your unspoken social contracts and bring them into the light of day, you’ll both be feel that much safer to continue to be intentional communicators in how you engage with each other in the long term. I really can’t imagine anything more romantic than intentionally sitting down with the person you love and having an extended conversation about what it means to them to be loved.īy co-creating your relationship contract, you will get the ultimate window into your partner’s physical/emotional/sexual needs. By getting it all out on the table early on in your relationship, you’ll be able to avoid fights, frustrations, and unnecessary internalized resentments because of the honesty that you brought to the process of creating your relationship contract. So much of the social contracts that we build with people in our lives are covert – that is to say they are never explicitly talked about.Ĭo-creating your relationship contract with your partner will give you both the opportunity to be 100% transparent and honest about what is important to you in your relationship.

Here are a few of the biggest benefits that you and your partner will likely experience after having a relationship contract written up. I have had dozens of my partnered/married clients write up relationship contracts with each other and the benefits in their relationship (and my own, personally) have been far-reaching. (Don’t worry… if you’re not sure where to start with your contract, much more detail is on its way.) The Benefits Of Having A Relationship Contract Et voila… you’ve just created your very own custom-made relationship contract! You write down/type up all of the things that each of you wants to include, print it off, and sign it. You sit down together and say, “Okay, what does being in a relationship mean to us individually? What’s important to us that we make sure we include in here? What can we put in our contract that would make you feel safe, loved, seen, and cared for?”

But, in truth, the contract is a catalyst for a very honest conversation. What Is A Relationship Contract?Ī relationship contract is a document that gets written up and signed by (usually) two people within an intimate relationship. There have been a few references to them in recent pop culture (most notably between Mark Zuckerberg and his wife Priscilla, on the TV show The Big Bang Theory, and – a version of one – in Fifty Shades of Grey), and the concept has been picking up steam as of late. Have you ever heard of a relationship contract (also sometimes referred to as a relationship agreement)?

Fifty shades of grey contract pdf